UZBEKI-BEKI-STAN-STAN by Wagenblatz

Parallel Universe . 2

Here in lovely Uzbeki-beki-stan-stan
We search for the perfect brain
And the most perfect one under an Uzbeki sun
Is the one on Herman Cain.

Though he refuses to know the name of our Prez
Nothing could be much clearer
Republicans gasp about everything he says
As he masturbates under a mirror.

There is nothing unclean in Uzbeki-beki-stan-stan
We have no crocodiles in our moat
And the only thing Trekky about dear Uzbeki
is our desire to be fucked by a goat.

So while we yield to the fist of this insistent lobbyist
and set our Peter Meter to SLOW
Wonder how long it takes when the takes off his brakes
And we scream, "Go, Herman! Go!"


As we're getting a tan in Uzbeki-beki-stan
We have focussed our Tan Man Scanner
While he's arranged his attack as a Jet Black Jack
Nobody could get much tanner.

Herman's coasted his Rolls to the top of the polls
He's invented all kinds of new tricks
Though he thinks it's fine to fix on NINE NINE NINE
We're all thinking: SIX SIX SIX.

Diagonally Parked by Dennis Doph (Wagenblatz)

Parallel Universe. 1

As I whirl my way through life
I am There
Musing my way between sensation and sensation
I am There
Exercising what's left of my will
To titillate or possibly thrill
Diminuendo, or perhaps a tiny trill
I am There! I am There!

As my Vehicle drives along
This scuzzy block we have happened upon
Buttons unbuttoned, weapons drawn
Signs
Exhort me to diagonally park
Not waste my time there after dark
Though all this Denial may cause a spark
.....of lust. I trust Because I care.
I am There. It's true! Are you?

See you unbuttoning your hairy chest
To be nursed Like all of the men
I have caroused and cursed
You may not be the best. Certainly,
You won't be the worst
Spoken the truth! Along with this cribbed
Quotation from Sweet Bird of Youth.

So please, ease this steamin' vehicle
You are driving or being driven in
To the place where we can both begin
To put this Parallel Universe into a Perpendicular spin
Though (just a little bit) it might hurt
Or spurt Baby, let me tear off
What's left of your shirt to wet it off
Before we get it off.

Let us pursue this palpitating hell
Double Parking parallel
As this Universe explodes
Let me powder your nodes
With another of my exemplary loads
Let this Parking be hilted
Before either of us has wilted
Or someone's husband or wife feels jilted.
Who cares? Mike, if you like,
I am Theirs!