Parallel Universe. 11
There's a housewife in far Abilene
Whose pursuits are essentially unclean
She rinses off tripes from her old babywipes
And sells the wipes on the old Craigslist scheme!
In Montecito a man called Perdue
Put his foot into some other shoe
If your chops get all wettish , offers up a foot fetish
With Craigslist providing the clue.
In Santa Barbara some twins named de Paul
Offer twin pleasures ... or nothing at all
While Betty gives head Barb is waiting in bed
For a check. Or your fast VISA scrawl.
Down in Texas in downscale Odessa
There's a haughty old babe named Contessa
she'll sell, on a dare, her mom's old Tupperware
Then check in with her Catholic confessor!
But the best of this lot is those guys
Under rainy Wenatchee Wash skies
Who will offer you blisses from both orifices
And an apple to top off the prize.
If you want either virgins or truckers
You can sort out all these motherfuckers
You can bet that they all will answer your call
These intrepid Craigslist Moneysuckers!
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