NO GREATER JOY

Parallel Universe. 3

Havin' a ball in Pleasantville Tennessee
Celebratin' the No Greater Joy Ministry
Michael Pearl and wife Debi just get off so fine
Whuppin' their kids with plastic plumbing line.
Pearls advocate strict toilet training and rough home schools
Raise children the way Amish treat their mules.

Admonish parents for being meek and mild
Self-publishing their book To Raise Up a Child.
Christian homeschoolers praise it in their magazines
Conjure up all kinds of delicious scenes.
Pastor Pearl gets a bonerific penis rocket
Flexible plumbing line down deep in his pocket.

Up in Sedro-Woolley, Washington
Larry and Cari Williams were havin' lots of fun
Homeschoolin' Ethiopian kids 11 to 7
Sendin' some of 'em straight up to heaven!
Found Daughter Hana in bad condition
From whuppin', hypothermia and malnutrition.
Larry Williams was an enthusiastic Skagit County rube
Whuppin' his kid with Pearl's plastic tube.

In California in a town called Paradise
Little Lydia Schatz was whupped in a manner awful nice
Parents Kevin and Elizabeth got some funny stares
Whuppin' Little Lydia and sayin' their prayers.
Minister Pearl puts all complaints right into the blower
...He is a champion tomahawk thrower.

"He that spoils the rod, hateth his son."
He says, throwin' that Hawk, havin' more fun.
Finicky homeschoolers, just save your breath.
Buy the book! And have fun
Beating your kid to death.