VERY VERY BIG MOUSTACHE by Wagenblatz

Parallel Universe . 27

Wednesday morn we took our Prius
Down to Downtown Montecito
Von's Store there was having a sale on
Brisket of beef. Oh my!

Store spread over several pricey acres
Montecito acres. Von's far as the eye
Could see What one saw Right off the bat
Whoever had the responsibility
For hiring men They had to be
Very, very gay

Everyone from boxboys straining muscle
Under tight VON'S hoodies To section managers
Sixtysomething men in pristine white shirts
And tasteful ties, beefy shoulders flexing
Provocatively
Under pristine white

The Manager of Managers
Slight, lean, handsome, late fifties
Hairy stud top with a very very big moustache
Big hairy hands with long fingers
an amazing bulge just below the belt buckle

Knew where the Cold Room was; somehow
Was obliged to ask:
"Where is the Cold Room?"

He intoned a husky radio baritone
"Just to the left of the Cheese Bar;
Watch your step going in; it's dark."

Just what I wanted to know.

Toyed around the Cheese Bar
for a couple of minutes Making
Sixtysomething Dad with the great shoulders
Go into an agony of shoulder-flexing

Took myself into the dim recesses
Of the Cold Room, there
At the end of the aisle
With the non-alcoholic beer
The Manager of Managers stood
Stroking
His very very big moustache with one hand
An amazing rock hard penis with the other

My knees hit the floor
Faster than Monica Lewinsky
With her Kneeling Pillow in the Lincoln Room.